Kate you need to breathe. It seems to me that you have taken on too many things. Something has to give...and it should not be your own sanity. I think, perhaps if you spoke to your bosses and cut back your hours at all of your job/internships just for the month they will help you out. If they do not, you must consider quitting. School is most important of all those things. It will lead to a better job and it is actually your "job" to complete college. I had a very similar situation when I was in college a million moons ago, and my English professor told me to quit my job. I thought he was an idiot. I said to him, "I need the JOB to PAY for your CLASS..." but in the end. If I had just gone to one less concert or bought one less cool outfit and taken time to get to work on his class, I would have been better off. It seems insane when you are inside of the situation, but there are simple solutions.
I've worked in retail as a simple cashier all the way to store manager. If you are a valued employee, they will do what they can to help you. They'll know that you can "pay back" the favor when the semester is over. I'm sure people will be wanting time off over the summer.
As far as cutting. Please don't. Please see your school's councilor. Go to the health center and ask to speak to a therapist or councilor. They will direct you to someone. The attention you seek is not paid for in blood. That is a very tricky situation. You can avoid this painful release and find something out about yourself at the same time. Remember that I said I was a store manager...One of the gals that worked for me had been a cutter. (Strangely enough, she had this really silly ear fetish as well) but she wore lots of bracelets and bandanas tied around her wrists. It was to cover the scars. She had come through that desperate place and to the other side, but the scars are forever. She is a lovely girl inside and out. So are you.
You always, ALWAYS have a place to talk, here. We love all our Trekkie friends.
Now...lets have a nice, silly drink with an umbrella in it and relax.
Thanks. I really mean it. The biggest problem with asking for time off is that I work at two small companies. For a really long time, there were only 4 employees, including the manager. Only two of us were trained to close, (manager doesn't work nights) the other was a day person. Myself and the other closer switched off as much as possible, but she preferred to be there in the day. It's a lot better now though, my pregnant coworker had her baby and she's now back after having her maternity leave. At the other job, I'm the main instructor for the junior program. Whenever I need time off, it creates a whole big mess since the only other girl trained to do my job is also the secretary. (not her exact title, but it sums up what she does.)
I think a lot of things will be better once nationals and finals are over. Nationals are this weekend and once that's over with, things should be smooth sailing. (I hope!) I've already started on next semester's class schedule and I am NOT going to include that cursed internship. *shudders* They don't value me in that program, nor do they value the rest of the marketing department. We all decided to quit once this semester was over.
Now, where are those silly drinks with the umbrellas?